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The Man Who Sued God

September 1, 2015

TMWSGSteve Myers is a lawyer who became a fisherman from frustration. When his one piece of property, his boat, is struck by lightning and destroyed he is denied insurance money because it was ‘an act of God’. He re-registers as a lawyer and sues the insurance company and the church under the guise of God, defending himself.

A God who throws lightning bolts does not make sense in our 21st century world. As Steve says: “God’s not in charge of that stuff anymore. We have this thing called science. We can predict the weather now.”

Either the Act of God clause is “some kind of giant all purpose lying mechanism” used by insurance agents to crush the little man, or it’s what it says it is: an act for which God ought to be responsible. So, Myers decides to sue the Church, summoning representatives of every major faith. As the legal twists and turns kick in, the religious leaders will only be able to win the case if they can prove one thing: that God doesn’t exist.

Jules Myers: You’re going to sue one of the world’s biggest insurance companies?

Steve Meyers: Well, apparently I wouldn’t stand a chance – I’m suin’ God.

Jules Myers: You know they say people make their own luck.

Rebecca: That’s stupid! Why would anyone make luck that bad?

Steve Meyers: So if God does exist, the Churches must be liable.

Anna Redmond: And the churches can only win the case if they prove God does not exist.

Steve Meyers: [laughs] Do you want to tell them?

Primate: It’s a sign.

Cardinal: A miracle.

Moderator: A winged messenger.

Gerry Ryan: It’s a f***ing cockatoo!

Rabbi: [about his Christian counterparts] They’re praying to God. They should be praying for better lawyers.

Steve Meyers: What do you think of a moral victory?

Anna Redmond: A moral victory sounds good.

David Myers: You can’t win, because they can’t afford to lose!

Jules: You’re going to sue one of the world’s biggest insurance

companies?

Steve: Well, apparently I wouldn’t stand a chance. I’m suing God.

Steve: Did God make the bolt of lighting that sunk my boat?

Clergyman: Yes—and no. These things don’t have easy answers.

Steve: How would you describe an act of God?

Clergyman: Well, acts of natural destruction—tidal waves …

Steve: … earthquakes, plagues of locusts … God’s not in charge of that

stuff anymore. We have this thing called science. We can predict

the weather now.

Lawyer: If you want to keep the money it would be better to say God

doesn’t exist.

Clergyman: I think we can take it as read that God exists.

Rabbi: I hope he does—I’ve spent half the morning singing to him.

Clergyman: What are the others doing about it?

Rabbi: They are all praying. They should be praying for better lawyers.

Clergyman: The only safe way is to prove that God does not exist.

Rabbi: That’s easier said than done.

Clergyman: It’s a question of faith. Either you believe he doesn’t exist

or you don’t.

Clergyman: It’s a poor world without faith, you know.

“The god of the act of God does not exist.” “Here, here,”

How can I sue the God who led me to this woman? I can’t sue love.”

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